The Slap of Mortality
by Keithan
Summary: SLASH. (Aragorn/Legolas). Legolas sees that Aragorn's mortality is reason enough for him to maintain their friendship and nothing more, silently fearing the pain of a loved one's death. (gee.. summaries, don't i just love them? o_0;) CONCLUDED!!!
1. A Walk With Memory

disclaimers: lord of the rings belongs to their rightful owners.  
a/n: lines of eówyn and some of aragorn are borrowed from the third book, rotk. and damn, i honestly don't know what i want to do here. if there are any grammer errors and typos, sorry, i'll edit it more thoroughly again if i have time. given the situation that aragorn had confessed his (oh-so-great!) love for legolas, i wrote this. i've handled arwen and aragorn's betrothal before, and decided she would just be aragorn's foster sister and friend here, although there'd prolly be no mention of her in this fic. takes place the night after the battle of the pelennor fields.. but it's not much of a spoiler to those who haven't read the 3rd book yet, *looks at a certain girl named chi...lol* all you have to know that it's a night after a great battle.. ^__^

nothing graphic but still contains SLASH [a/l]. now shoo, if you don't like it. i'm sure there are many hetero fics out there you might like.  
single quotes are elvish, and italicized words are memories.

**THE SLAP OF MORTALITY__________  
**part 1: a walk with memory

Legolas averted his eyes from the carnage of orcs and humans alike on the ground somewhere in the distance. Instead, swiftly and quickly, he made his way through the battlefield and to the tents of the Dúnedain.

It had been a long day and the battle that was fought had been far more than hard and tiring. Although he might not be as weary as men were, it left his heart heavy with the fading hope of victory over the Nameless Foe that lied in the east.

For the moment even though victory was on their side, much was lost. Noble men and valiant warriors that stood up against the host of Mordor had fallen with great honor protecting their city. 

No matter how one would see it, it still was a battle lost.

Men looked up as he passed by. Such fair a being in such environment that screamed death was an uncanny sight, at least to them. Elves weren't seen often in Minas Tirith, and the sight of one in the time of war made it more unlikely to them, for this Elf was neither with a thousand other Elf warriors nor an army to aid them.

Legolas gave them no attention, his cloak doing well in covering his body entirely save for his head. He was here because he was one of the Nine that had set out. And he held that knowledge with pride. What kept him there, however, he was uncertain. If it was for his sense of duty, obligation and responsibility, or strong ties of friendship between the Fellowship, or if he was held with the strong will of Isildur's heir, as many had been, he knew not for sure.

Maybe, indeed, it was the will of Aragorn that kept him there, or the love of him as well, as the Lady Eówyn had said.

As Estel, he was the hope for the race of men, which had been scattered and divided for many years now. As Strider, he was the keeper of peace, fighting off as a Ranger the danger that threatened peaceful lands. As Aragorn, he was a Man blooming to Kingship, a leader in all ways, and a follower as well. And now, for all the years of knowing him, Legolas had a glimpse of what awaits Gondor. Elessar, he was called, and he bore the banner of the White Tree.

All he knew was that whatever would happen, he wished to have a part in it, and Gimli shared that sentiment. For the honor or for the love of Aragorn, or for both, again he was uncertain.

_"So may one counsel another," The voice of the Lady Eówyn stopped Legolas in his tracks. It was brave and determined, suggesting the strength of her spirit. "Yet I do not bid you flee from peril, but to ride to battle where your sword may win renown and victory. I would not see a thing that is high and excellent cast away needlessly."_

_Legolas was amazed at such determination and courage. But he never did wonder why. Eówyn's love for Aragorn was laid out for him to see. And blame her, he could not, for anyone could not help but love the Man upon meeting him and knowing him. _

_Yet, he knew, based from experience, a love for him that was beyond a love for a friend, master, and leader would prove to be perilous to him, so stay away from it, he tried. Truly, he did._

_"Nor would I." Legolas was firmly held in place as Aragorn spoke. He shouldn't be listening in on them, he knew. But his feet refused to move. "Therefore I say to you Lady: Stay! For you have no errand to the South." _

_"Neither have those others who go with thee. They go only because they would not be parted from thee-because they love thee." At those words, Legolas thoughtfully frowned, his hand stilled on the booth's entrance._

_Indeed. Their love for Aragorn had them continue the quest without hesitations or questions. But surely, he loved Aragorn as one would love a leader and a friend, at least that's what he wanted himself to believe._

_Suddenly, he was not so certain as he had been for the past days. He had ventured beyond that love once, and forget it, he tried, and he thought he succeeded._

_How long he stood there, he had no idea._

_"Legolas." _

_The soft call of his name brought his attention back. He blinked and saw Aragorn standing in front of him. The warm hand on his cheek was left unnoticed until then. Leaning slightly to the familiar touch to acknowledge it, but restraining himself so as not to be too comfortable with it, he said, "Her love for you is not something I could measure."_

_Aragorn sighed and looked down. "It grieves me to hear that. For it brings me shame as it would to any man, to not be able to reciprocate the feelings of a lady." Truly, his heart grieved to look at the Lady knowing he wouldn't be able to return her feelings. Running his thumb on the smooth cheek, he looked back at the Elf. "Yet," he said. "The same words could be said for my love for you."_

_Legolas felt the familiar heat in him, his heart beating faster. But he looked away, unable to bear Aragorn's eyes for everything would clearly be there for him to see as it always had been, and he wanted it not. He refused to acknowledge the warmth he felt with those words. He merely smiled. _

_"Rest, Estel." Legolas gently ordered, his hand coming up to cover Aragorn's own as he slowly removed it from his face. "You will need it." He continued, voice soft and filled with concern. Concern as a friend, he reminded himself. With a soft squeeze on Aragorn's hand, he walked past him and went out of the booth he shared with Gimli and him._

_Left behind him, Aragorn sighed, knowing the reaction all too well._

Legolas shook his head. Clearing his thoughts and stirring them away from the thought of the war and the fact that he was immortal and Aragorn was not.

A fact that prevented him to ever acknowledge his continuous growing love for such Man who was more than worthy of it. It was a feeling he would not attempt to put into words, much more acknowledge, lest he would find himself already too attached that the borders of mortality would fade and be unrightfully forgotten only to be reminded in a harsh way such as death.

And forget it, he tried, and still was trying.

Their gentle touches would remain as a token of their special friendship that danced on love of friends and something more. And he planned it to remain that way.

Thankfully for him, Aragorn's high respect for him prevented the man to go further than a sweet caress.

He continued his way, walking and taking his time by going slow. As he did, his eyes roamed over the camp-pitched tents, soldiers bustling around everywhere- and he observed all that was around him. 

As he watched a young boy running up to someone, who he assumed was the boy's father, and hugged him, a soft smile formed in his lips. Perhaps war made people realized the value of each other. 

Indeed. He learned to value the companionship he had with the Company and even to conquer the differences between Gimli and him and used it as a fuel to their still growing friendship. 

Although, the events also led him to slowly realize that his love for his friend would not be contained for long. 

He sighed. If things continued to go that way, perhaps he would truly be forced to witness the death of a mortal lover. But if he could, he'd try to maintain their friendship and nothing more. For a death of a friend, even though still very much grievous, was something much less painful.

**~~~**

a/n: send in your feedbacks. tell me you don't get it or what..i'd appreciate hearing from you. and, btw, this is not a one shot fic. *yawn* i have to go sleep now, my bed is calling me to lie down and get all comfy with the pillows and blankets... and do that i will..


	2. Naught but Friends

disclaimers: y'all know lotr isn't mine.  
a/n: thanks to those who reviewed. well, this came out fast. gawd, sparring with a friend of mine does do me good. she's my favorite sparring partner ever! uh, erm, yeah, as i was saying, this is takes place after the last chp, basically a continuation, yes, legolas is still walking.. *laughs* anyway, on to the story..

contains SLASH or male/male [aragorn/legolas]. now, go, press the back button now if you'd rather read something else.  
single quotes are elvish, and italicized words are memories. 

******THE SLAP OF MORTALITY__________**  
part 2: naught but friends

The night was dark as it had been for as long as this world existed. But the fear that dawn would not come was what made the darkness of the night very much foreboding and unwanted.

Soldiers lit torches and placed them in different places, lighting the camp enough for them all. They did not dare light any more.

These days were not exactly the times when one could camp, lay back down and gaze at the stars. The velvet sky now didn't even have a single spot and sparkle of a diamond because stars had been obscured by the overwhelming darkness of the Dark Lord.

Legolas looked sorrowfully at Men who tended their wounds and more at Men lying nearly dead on bedrolls being cared for by others. If the Battle of the Pelennor Fields yielded to such destruction, he cringed to think what more would come out if they battle with Sauron's main forces head on.

He fisted his hand on his sides, which were hidden underneath his cloak. 

Men here and there were doing what they could do at the little time of peace in between battles to gear up and gather what was left of their armory, preparing horses and packs, swords and shields, spears and helm, everything that would be needed in battle. For even though their next move was yet to be decided or declared, one thing was for sure, the battle had only begun.

He passed by a circle of men around a bonfire who had just sat down to sup. Their faces carried the despair that these dark days brought to all and although the conversation would sometimes call up laughter among them, it was only for a brief moment.

Again, many looked up as he passed around them, wondering exactly what a lone Elf was doing here on the south, far from where Elves dwell on the North, whether in Rivendell, Lothlórien, or Mirkwood. And briefly, he wondered why he had left his hood down, for although Elrohir and Elladan did get the same treatment, they didn't stood out as he did for their dark locks was less noticeable than his golden ones. He knew the talk of the three Elves amid the war had grown.

One from Rohan recognized him and nodded once in a respectful greeting, having known who he was and what part he had in all this. All in the circle turned to him.

Looking back at him for a few moments, Legolas returned the greeting with a simple nod before going on his way.

"An Elf!" He heard when they thought he was far enough not to hear. They had mistakenly calculated or they had simply forgotten or not known how keen an Elf's hearing was. He judged that the one who spoke was a man from Gondor. Elves were rarely seen in this part of Middle-earth.

"Indeed, such a fair folk they are!" Legolas continued his way, slowly walking to where he was headed. Still he kept his attention to the conversation as it slowly was being covered by other much nearer sounds.

"Yea. That, they are. And he was no exception. Has he ridden in war with us?" Such a curious question from one so strong as a warrior of Gondor. In these days, they willingly embraced all help, even from one individual from the 'fair folk' as they said.

"From whence and did he come from? Was he with the Dúnedain?" The great Rangers from the north, Legolas mused. He closed his eyes briefly. Yes, he came with them and had ridden beside their captain, Aragorn, also Elessar, the Elfstone, and Isildur's heir.

_Legolas hadn't slept that night. And he wished he could say it was because he couldn't tear his eyes away from the beauty of the stars or because of the peace he felt in the forest. But he could not. For no stars adorned the sky above, and the forest laid beyond the borders of the fortress of Dunharrow. _

_He just sat there awake, gazing ahead as if expecting someone to appear and attack him soon, when almost all lie, restless, maybe, but still asleep._

_In a couple of hours, at least, they would go on ahead on their journey to, as Aragorn had already planned, the Paths of the Dead._

_People would cringe in fear and dread just by hearing the name. He, having no anxiety of death whatsoever, being an immortal as he was, didn't fear it that much._

_And Aragorn? To Legolas, it seemed he had no fear._

_But unknown to him, Aragorn's fear didn't include battles and wars for he had expected them as long as the Dark Lord lives. His fear was for the Elf, himself. The same fear that he had, fear of loss and downright rejection, for Legolas hadn't either encouraged or discouraged him. It was as if, to the Man, that the Elf was playing it safe. But he respected him for his decision and was willing to wait._

_A few paces behind Legolas, he heard the curtain of their booth being pushed aside, and from the sound of the footsteps, it was not Gimli. That gave him one choice left. Aragorn._

_"Why do you not rest?" Aragorn's voice from behind him said. And the Ranger did nothing to conceal his worry._

_Legolas shrugged. "Do not worry so, Estel, I am merely clearing my head." Not looking back, he answered, thinking he lost the eloquence he prided himself for with that statement. _

_Of all the years he had known the Man-and he had known him since the latter was just barely out of childhood-Aragorn could be as protective as a mother could be. _

_"Do you want me to sit there with you?" Aragorn asked, and Legolas looked back at the hesitation he thought he heard in his friend's voice._

_Thinking he could use a company, a friend by his side, Legolas said, "Yes, please." He knew that the other, too, would probably want to 'clear his head' of the troubles that most likely swam endlessly in his mind._

_Aragorn sat close beside Legolas. And the Elf, used to such contact between them ever since Aragorn had revealed what he felt, slightly leaned towards the Man for the weariness had finally caught up with him. Encouraged, Aragorn encircled an arm on his shoulder._

_Legolas sighed, not knowing what to make of their relationship. He never had said anything in reply to Aragorn's courting, if it would be put that way, simply because he never wanted anything to go between them except for friendship, no matter how his heart told him otherwise. And he was thankful their friendship did not falter when Aragorn had made his feelings clear. If anything, they became much closer friends. With Legolas turning away every time Aragorn would put into words his love._

_It brought him a cold fear that with every word Aragorn said, every feeling he confessed, he would find himself already too attached, he might have a hard time letting go. Aragorn was a mortal, after all._

_Finally feeling the weight of weariness brought by such hard and dark days and the sleepless nights since they had set out for search of the hobbits, Legolas allowed himself to rest his head, which had suddenly gone heavy, on the other's shoulder._

_Silence covered them like a protective and comfortable blanket. It was a mantle of security in all the chaos that was happening._

_A few moments later, Legolas' breathing became slow and even. Aragorn looked at him and found his eyes in a hazy state of an Elf's sleep. A small smile formed in his lips. Gently and carefully, he slipped another arm under Legolas' knees and slowly stood up, carrying him. He fully expected the Elf to wake up, but he didn't. _

_The security Legolas felt, not known to Aragorn, had been enough to put him to sleep._

_Aragorn had confirmed his suspicions that Legolas hadn't indeed slept ever since they had went in search for the hobbits, which was nearly two weeks ago. For every time he awoke, he found Legolas awake, as if he hadn't slept at all, and it was true. The battle at Helm's Deep hadn't helped in their rest at all. And any sleep he might have had after the parley with Saruman had been disturbed by Pippin's looking in the palantír and the Winged Nazgûl's passing over their camp._

_He then laid Legolas in the Elf's bedroll, careful not to disturb both the Elf and Gimli. He had a few hours to spare. Legolas should at least have his rest, he thought. At daybreak, they would set out. He was about to reach out a hand to brush a non-existent hair in Legolas' face, but he stopped, pulling his hand back. Shaking his head, he walked out with a heavy heart, knowing Legolas still refused his advances._

There was a loud clang as a shield fell on the ground from a soldier's hold, causing Legolas' head to snap back to the sound, bringing him back to the present. 

He gently chided himself for letting his thoughts stray. He glanced back at the circle of men he just passed by to see just how long his mind had drifted. He could still hear them, so it probably wasn't that long.

"Ah, my friends," The one from Rohan said. "He came with the Lord Aragorn, captain of the Dúnedain. Legolas is his name, and any help from such a skilled archer was greatly appreciated by our late King Theoden." The man explained. "I believe he was one of the nine, who are now rumored to had set out even before we even knew of the danger."

Looking back ahead, Legolas raised his hand from under the grey Lórien cloak and massaged his temples, remembering Theoden and the Fellowship. 

Would all of them suffer the same fate as the kindly old King? Would all of them find their doom in this Great War against the Dark Lord? Or would he stand by and be lucky enough to live and watch his friends die in battle with honor?

No one knew, not even an Elf of immortal life with many years behind him, could say.

The Fellowship had become his family, his most trusted friends. In it lays his heart. What he feared the most was that all of them should live, and being the immortal that he was, he would be forced to watch as the days go by and when time had weighed great upon his friends' shoulders, it would be their time to depart. And he could do nothing but live on and continue as, one by one, the family he knew would leave him.

It was a knowledge that served as the only wall that separated himself from Aragorn. He thought it better that way. 

Suddenly, he felt the urge to turn back, to not see Aragorn, his fear momentarily clouding his judgment. What for? If they should die someday, might as well stay away then so that it would not cause him much grief as it would when he stayed too close.

He hadn't felt that he stopped. He blinked and looked around. 

Once again, he shook his head before placing the base of his palm on his forehead. 'What am I thinking?' he whispered in Elvish. But he failed to conjure up thoughts that would counter his not-so-welcomed previous ones.

He sighed. He had tried to take a break from the thoughts of the battle earlier and the battle ahead, and now he found himself in a battle against himself.

He couldn't love Aragorn in such way. He was his best friend ever since. And any love greater than a friend's love would have to be ignored lest he may find himself already doomed to grief at their inevitable parting.

But he'll be damned; his love for the mortal had already been making itself known to him. 

'I cannot succumb to this.' Shaking his head, he whispered to himself as he rubbed his temples, trying to avoid an incoming headache. 'It would grieve me too much.'

**~~~**

a/n: have you heard orlando's voice in lotr.net? the official movie site? it was so nice.. billy's voice too! well okay, all their voices were nice -_-" what lovely accents..^__^ well, go, tell me what you think.. not about the voices, the chapter.. *lol* drop me a line! 


	3. To Ask Not

disclaimers: you know lotr isn't mine.. right? no? then i'm telling you it's not.   
a/n: thanks to all who reviewed! it's been a while since i came in contact into the online world again! hehehe..

nothing graphic but still contains SLASH [a/l]. now shoo, if you don't like it. i'm sure there are many hetero fics out there you might like.  
single quotes are elvish, and italicized words are memories.

**THE SLAP OF MORTALITY__________  
**part 3: to ask not

When Legolas looked up, he realized he had reached the place where the Dúnedain had pitched their tents up. He looked around, and not long he spotted one a bit isolated from the rest and assumed it belonged to Aragorn.

He sighed and slowly made his way, hoping that Aragorn would at least be finding some rest, even how little it may be, and not worrying about this or that. He cared for the Man and to worry for him was a natural reaction.

Aragorn deserved even a moment of rest and solitude in a time when his presence was called for here and there. So busy was he that he hadn't spent that much time with the Elf and the Dwarf.

Time Legolas had spent with the Ranger had been very short to none at all since they had left Dunharrow. He had exchanged merely short words and phrases with him since. He and Gimli had, wisely or foolishly, stepped aside in Aragorn's way for the soon king had too much to think about. That time, Aragorn had never stopped to amaze the Elf and even Gimli for he had suddenly rose up from becoming the Ranger that he was and was rightly acting as Elessar, the King of Gondor, would.

Slowly but surely, Legolas thought, his hour was drawing near.

When he reached the tent, Legolas remained standing outside. The entrance was barely open, the cloth was slightly waved to the side, light from the outside poured in a stream in the dark tent. And there he could see, Aragorn's form sitting wearily on a chair, his head rested on one of his hands. A single lamp was lit on the table in front of him, its light dim.

His heart reached out to him but he considered turning back, not wanting to disturb the Ranger, if he was still to call him that, on his short moment alone to himself. He looked at Aragorn's back, hesitant. He sighed softly and sadly. Aragorn had much on his mind right now and Legolas thought it would be best to leave him be. Even though he wanted to walk in and comfort and help the King, who had yet to claim his throne, with the heavy burden on his shoulders, Aragorn would most likely wish to be on his own.

He started to walk back when a voice from the inside stopped him.

'Legolas, please, don't deprive me of your presence now.' Aragorn's voice in the flowing Elvish tongue made Legolas' heart sing. Though it was heavy with weariness as it pleaded for the Elf to stay. The blonde Elf was surprised and turned back to look at him.

The Ranger hadn't moved from his position, his back still turned to him. Frowning, the Elf wondered how his presence was known.

It was then he saw the shadow he cast inside when he blocked the entrance. He shook his head, mildly amused. How come he didn't notice that sooner?

Brushing up the cloth that closed the entrance with his hand, he entered.

"Drop the curtain behind you." Aragorn asked softly, and again, his voice revealed how the later days had tired him, if not physically, then emotionally or mentally.

Legolas did, leaving the tent depending on the dim lamp for light. He walked over and stood behind Aragorn, taking hold of the back of his chair. "You look weary, Elessar." He said softly, using a name Aragorn rightly deserves now.

Leaning his head back to the Elf's solid form behind him, Aragorn kept his eyes closed, wanting his weariness to dissolve and disappear. 'From you, Legolas, not yet.' He whispered in Elvish. 'Not yet.'

Legolas realized that it must be the first time Aragorn had been alone for the day and truly, he was weary as a soldier that had just come from battle. And that, he was. It was as if many years had been added on him as this quest finally neared its climax. Raising his hand from the chair, he rested them on Aragorn's shoulders and began to smooth out the knots on his back. Aragorn gave a soft sound of thanks. 

'Then Estel,' Legolas said, changing his use of name. 'What have you been doing?' his voice was light and it gave Aragorn the comfort of a normal conversation, not one in which decisions had to be made and choices had to be weighed and chosen.

Aragorn's hand reached out to softly take hold of one of Legolas wrists as the Elf continued to soothe his back. The fact that Legolas was surprised and nearly backed away slipped his notice since he was used to such contact between them. 'Elfstone, I was called as I went around with the brethren Elladan and Elrohir to give aid and heal those that I can earlier this night.'

'And it bothers you?' Legolas asked.

'Nay, it does not. It was supposed to be expected. I..' Shaking his head, he sighed, the sound seemed defeated and weary. 'This land hungers for the leadership of a King, Legolas.' he continued.

'Then they shan't be looking and waiting for long. Your hour draws nigh.'

Smiling weakly, Aragorn said, 'Indeed, it does.' And fell silent once again. 

'But what it holds for me, I know not.' He continued after a while.

'Your reign will be great, Aragorn, that, I know.' Legolas said.

'But it will not last forever..'

Legolas eyes had suddenly darkened, and he heard not the rest of Aragorn's statement. Yes, it would not last forever, he knew, and wanted to say. But Aragorn needed not to remind him of that matter, he knew it fully well.

Unknown to him, Aragorn narrowed his eyes at him in worry and suspicion as the Elf's eyes seemed to stare at the light of the lamp but appeared not to be seeing it.

The Man pretended to cough a little, and that brought the Legolas' attention back.  He felt it more than he saw it that Legolas had shook his head lightly, perhaps to rid thoughts in his head, for he too, often did that.

'What is on your mind, little one?' Aragorn asked Legolas who still stood behind him.

The blonde Elf scrunched up his nose at the way he was addressed.

'On my mind? I'm thinking of what to do with you if I hear you call me that again.' As if to emphasize his point, he squeezed Aragorn's shoulders hard enough to call forth a wince from the Man. 

But still, Aragorn only chuckled at the empty threat.

Legolas snorted. 'And you, Estel? What is on your mind?' Peering down to him, Legolas asked.

He knew that if Aragorn answered him seriously, it would take them the whole night to discuss just one of the many things that occupied his mind at the present. But if Aragorn needed company besides the captains that speak of war, then he would gladly lend his ear and listen.

Aragorn smiled, making his face gentle and younger. He looked up at Legolas who stared down at him, golden strands framing his face. Reaching up a hand, he caressed Legolas' cheek in a touch so feeble it rivaled the touch of a feather. 'Naught, little one. Nothing for now but you with me.'

Unwillingly, Legolas stiffened, his eyes flickered for a moment with fear and uncertainty, and his earlier thoughts came unbidden to his mind. Slowly dropping his hands to his sides, he opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again when nothing came out. He raised a hand to tuck a non-existent hair back into place and took a step back, causing Aragorn to look back at him, worried.

Recovering from his surprise at the sudden but not unexpected touch, he said, 'You tire yourself too much.' Shaking his head in a motherly gesture. He noticed then the discarded pack on the floor, its contents, blankets and spare clothing nearly scattered.

Finding himself something to do, he bent down and picked them up, folding them neatly before he placed them back on the pack, thinking that he shouldn't be _thinking _ too much before talking to Aragorn lest his heart reveals itself, not only to the Man but even to himself. Little did he know that it was too late, Aragorn had read his eyes.

Too occupied was he, or too occupied he made himself to be that he didn't notice Aragorn had stood up until the Man had taken hold of both of the Elf's wrist and gently stopped him from what he was doing.

But Legolas didn't raise his eyes to him and instead focused them on the blanket in his hands. 'Your things are a mess, Aragorn. You..'

'Look at me, Legolas.' At those words, the fear that he'd find himself already deeply fallen had returned to him, and maybe it was just the case.

With a single look and the way his body had tensed, both hadn't went unnoticed to the Elfstone, he had destroyed the perfect balance of their relationship. The balance between friends and lovers, friendship and love.

Hesitantly, Legolas raised his eyes. And even before meeting Aragorn's own, he felt his piercing gaze as it tried to reveal the concealed in him.

'A shadow hangs over you, and it is not the shadow that all in Middle-earth now share.' Aragorn said softly, all the while trying to read Legolas' eyes. 'Something tells me it has something to do with me, or you would not have recoiled from my touch, nor would you avoid my eyes.'

Never before had Legolas experienced being the one in the corner. Yet cornered or not, fearful or brave, he couldn't lie or evade the question. Looking straight into the others eyes, voice surprisingly steady and unwavering, he answered, words just slipping out of his mouth. 'You cannot ask me to love you, Estel.' he said albeit softly. 'You cannot.'

**~~~**

a/n: i think i'll just have another chapter more, i don't seem to find time to do anything anymore. drop me a line!   
*walks away muttering how uncomfortable a female groin guard could be..*


	4. Facing Thy Shadows

disclaimers: chill out because i'm not claiming them as mine.  
a/n: well, i think i'll finish it here. just wrapped things up.

SLASH or male/male [aragorn/legolas] is invovled.. now go, and find a fic to read if you don't like this one.

**THE SLAP OF MORTALITY__________  
**part 4: facing thy shadows

A cloud of confusion briefly hovered on Aragorn's features. "I am not, Legolas," he said after a moment of thought. "I thought you knew that."

Legolas looked down. 

Somehow, Aragorn feared the action, for Legolas always looks to the side every time he looked away to avoid his glance. Never had the Elf lowered neither his gaze nor his head when speaking to him.

"I do." The Elf said, sounding like a meek, timid child for a moment. Slipping back in Elvish, he said, 'I just don't want myself to love you.'

Sudden grief overwhelmed Aragorn like a wave of water splashing at the shores. To hear his loved one say that tore at his heart. For a moment, words failed him and he couldn't speak. The silken wrists in his hands were suddenly like fire that burned him.

Legolas knew their close friendship was but a history now. Memories of yesterday that would be treasured and cherished. He was ready to walk out of the tent now, and probably by doing so, walk out of some part in Aragorn's life as well.

"But you love me, do you not?" Legolas' eyes flew open at that, yet it took a great part of his will not to suddenly look up. 

Given another situation, he would have frowned at such audacity and boldness and lifted his chin up high. But Aragorn's voice shook slightly, his words faltered and hesitation was dripping in every syllable. 

Slowly, preparing himself to drown in the depths of the Man's eyes, he raised his head. His eyes shone with the fear of loss, of hurt and pain. They showed the fear of being immortal, when his heart had already fallen for someone not so.

Aragorn's eyes softened. 

And like one who would read a complicated book many times, he then understood. 

'You fear the Gift of Men, as it was once called.' he stated, softly but sure.

Legolas did nothing to deny it. Softly, he agreed. 'Yes, in fact I probably do.' Shaking his head, he said, 'You must understand me, Aragorn, you cannot let me love you when you'd definitely not live as long as I.'

'People come and go, Legolas.' He said gently, as though he was talking to a child and not to a millenia old Elf. 'They leave and only mark their passage like footprints in the sand.' Releasing the Elf's right wrist, he reached out and cupped Legolas' cheek. The Elf turned his face away.

'You are a mortal, Aragorn. I am not.' Legolas said, emphasizing the last words. He sounded defiant. The meek and timid child had gone. 'And mortals do not live forever.'

Gently, Aragorn tilted Legolas' chin so that he would face him again. Looking at the Elf, nothing seemed to exist anymore but the two of them alone. And by locking his gaze with him, he was able to melt any rising anger in Legolas. Slowly, he closed the gap between them and covered Legolas' lips in a kiss. Hesitant at first, but when he got no rejection only a soft sigh of resignation, he let go of the Elf's other wrist and slipped his arm around his waist, bringing Legolas closer to him.

Legolas had never felt so secure in his entire life. He responded by slightly opening his mouth in a soft sound of pleasure, allowing Aragorn to deepen the kiss.

Such a peaceful and comforting feeling had enveloped them both that it seemed the threat of war had long passed them by, leaving them in utter peace and contentment.

But such wasn't the case, Legolas realized as Aragorn parted the kiss and as he did, the Man said, 'Indeed, they don't.' Resting his forehead on Legolas' he continued, 'But their love that is true, do.'

Words hadn't been able to form in Legolas' mind. Aragorn had spoken with wisdom and the words that he had uttered had touched him. He tightly closed his eyes. This was what he was depriving himself of. Love that was true, given freely to him, offered to him, yet he held his back. Offering naught but friendship in return and only a shadow of his love through a gentle touch now and then, Legolas realized that what he was turning his back from was the eternity of the love that would ever blossom between them.

He feared his own feeling, his own emotion. And by doing so, he nearly sentenced himself in a life of ignorance. Ignorance of how it was to love and be loved by the one your heart truly desires.

The internal debate Legolas had been unknown to Aragorn. Leaning down once more, the Man gave the Elf a soft and tender kiss. A chaste one but still it made Legolas feel the familiar but ignored warmth in his heart.

'I would rather live and hold the memory of that kiss in my heart, remembering it as my days grow weary..' Aragorn breathed out. '..than live without even experiencing that brief moment of bliss I shared with you.'

Legolas eyes unconsciously widened at that. The words had hit its mark, right into his very heart.

Slowly, Aragorn pulled away, slipping his arm off Legolas' waist and placed a decent distance between them.

The Elf nearly shivered at the sudden coldness and chill that had come upon him. The lost of contact suddenly left him feeling alone and the security he felt had drained from him. 

He raised his eyes to meet Aragorn. Silently asking him to bring security once more.

But both then turned when light poured in from the outside as someone brushed the tent flap up. There, in the entrance, stood Elladan, seemingly clueless, who looked as if he realized he just disturbed something and stood unmoving, his eyes went back and forth at the grim faces of Legolas and Aragorn.

'Aragorn, brother, you..' Elrohir said as he suddenly stepped up beside Elladan, but stopped when he saw Legolas there. 'Ah, Legolas! I'm glad to see you are well.'

The blonde Elf gave him a weak smile, although he truly was glad at seeing his long time friends fine and well after the day's events. 'I'm glad you two are the same, and by that I do not mean your looks.' He said, earning a soft laugh from the twins. 'I best be going now, Gimli is waiting.' Not giving Aragorn a look, he started walking out.

Sensing something amiss, Elrohir's eyes darted to Aragorn for an explanation. But his foster brother just looked at him desperately as if saying he didn't know what to do. Elladan nodded to Legolas who was just about to exit the tent, just beside Elrohir, signaling he must not let the blonde Elf just walk away.

Seeing Elladan, Aragorn called out, 'Legolas.' He walked towards him and the twins made their way inside the tent so as to give them some space.

Legolas didn't look back, but he stopped. He felt Aragorn stood just behind him. He smiled sadly to himself. Truly, he would rather live and hold the memory of their love for eternity than live not experiencing it at all. He had been so blind. Although the realization came to him as a light in a darkened room, he needed time, time to face his fears before facing Aragorn himself.

'If you must know, Aragorn,' He said softly, still not turning back. 'Yes, I do.' He said it so slowly it was as if every word was well thought over before they were even said.

Aragorn frowned in confusion. 'What?'

Legolas looked back and saw the questioning look on Aragorn's face. He smiled softly and reach out a hand to Aragorn's cheek, something he never dared to do before. Then remembering Elladan and Elrohir, he gave them a glance and saw them immediately turn away. It seemed Elladan had suddenly found his nails interesting and Elrohir suddenly became a moth and was busy playing with the light of the lamp. 

He gave them no more attention, slightly amused as he was, and turned back to Aragorn. The look on the ranger's face was that of surprise. 'I said yes, I do.' He said again, drawing each syllable out slowly. He then gave him a last glance and turned away, walking back to his own tent, which was in the far side of the Dúnedain's camp.

When the Elf was a good distance away, he heard the Man shout out joyfully while laughing, 'You fool! The moment you admit you love me you turn your back on me! Legolas, you hear me! We are not yet finished!'

Legolas only laughed but didn't turn back. He just raised his hand in a wave. 

He then walked back to join Gimli once more, remembering how his friendship with Aragorn had suddenly made a drastic turn. That night would be a different chapter in his life for the love in his heart had finally been set free and it soared and sang over the mountains and sea. 

Yes, he would have to face his shadows but with Aragorn as his light, he feared nothing.

He would rather live, love and be loved in return than live without experiencing Aragorn's love.

Indeed, how blind and fearful he had been. 

Unconsciously lifting his fingers to his lips, he thought of how mortality was but a fraction of a whole, and he knew that the greater part of that whole was the warmth he felt in his heart with every touch, the security and comfort in Aragorn's arms, and the love that filled him and made him complete and it would last for an eternity for as long as his heart beats.

'Truly, my love for you, Elessar, is something even I can't measure.'  His words were whispered softly and were carried by the wind as it faded away in the darkness of the night, unheard to anyone.

And what came of the days after, and the days after darkness, had been truly the most blessed years in all of his immortal life, and never would he forget it as long as the waves crash into the shores and the sun rises in the east and sets in the west.

**~end**

a/n: my head hurts.. maybe that's what suddenly appearing online after a long while do.. gee.. well, drop me a line, it won't take long. ^__^


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